You ever get to the point where you have nothing to lose, so you're ready to face your biggest fears? That's where I am now. For past few days, I feel like I've been hitting several low points, and each point is a reality check. It makes me analyze all of my actions that led me to here. It's forcing me to take ownership of the things that I make excuses for: overspending, procrastination, work, stagnation, etc. I'm beginning to see parts of myself that I've tried to ignore before. These moments are opportunities for growth and to learn. It's a chance for me to admit to my faults and accept that I'm not perfect and neither is my life. It's time for me to embrace vulnerability. In the end, I know I will become wiser, and I will blossom into something great. But for now, I just have to push through the best that I can.
Last year for my birthday I decided to treat myself to a solo vacation. Everyone thought I had lost my mind, especially my mom. I've always said I wanted to go to Phoenix and LA, but never put much thought into it. I went on the Southwest website and found roundtrip tickets for $60 from Chicago to Phoenix, so I jumped on it. It was the most amazing trip ever! I rented a beautiful condo for cheap on Airbnb and a car through Turo. The owners lived next door and allowed me in the backyard to relax whenever I wanted. They also had orange and grapefruit trees all over the property and said they're free to pick. The wife left a basket of them for me at the front door every morning. During this trip I also purchased my first crystals- an amethyst and clear quartz.
Fast forward to later that year. I came across $80 roundtrip tickets to LA, and had another amazing time. Little did I know, I was using the law of attraction for both trips. If you've never heard of it I highly recommend looking into it and watching The Secret. I didn't know how I was going or when, but I knew at some point I was going. I never questioned or doubted it. For both places, a one way ticket usually costs double the prices I paid for roundtrips or more...a lot more.
Fast forward again to this year. I told myself I wanted to travel and explore more. I didn't know how I was going to pay or where I would go, but I knew I was doing something. I've already gone on a cruise earlier this. I visited St. Kitts and explored the entire island. I got to be in a rainforest and saw a volcano or the first time! It was beautiful! I look back at this past year and wonder how did this happen to me??? I'm forever grateful. I'm now preparing to do a family vacation in two weeks to Florida. Then another cruise in February.
The moral of this is to put out what you want and believe in it. No matter how big it is. Don't get caught up in the "how" of things. Just let the universe take care of it. I'm working a part time job and was in school for a good portion of this timeline, so I could've easily blocked everything due to worrying. But I didn't. So just put out whatever you want to receive in the universe and let it go! When it comes around you'll get everything you wanted and more.
I've recently began saving to upgrade my camera (I currently shoot with a Canon T3i). Now that I'm trying to shoot more often to turn this hobby into a career/business, I figured I should begin investing in my craft.
Lately, I've been obsessing over the Facebook group build + bloom by jessica whitaker. It's a group created by Youtuber and Photographer Jessica Whitaker for those who are interested in taking photos to not only share their work but to give tips and critiques to help eachother grow. It's filled with some pretty amazing talents. I've learned quite a bit from this group; if you're into photography I definitely recommend joining!
While I save, I'm dedicating this time to really study and practice shooting. I'm constantly on Youtube and reading up on different techniques and styles.
Stay tuned because I will have my new camera by fall!